Two Years Ago Today...

Two years ago today, we said goodbye to my precious daddy. It was all so unexpected, and happened way too fast. None of us ever imagined having to say goodbye so soon. There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t think of him. I have this fear that I will forget what life was like when he was here, or the sound of his voice, or the way he looked. The last time I saw my dad, he didn’t look like himself. He had miraculously made it through a 10 hour surgery, and was begging us with his eyes to let him go. We told him that he would be alright, he would come through this, and he shook his head telling us no. We are thankful that we were able to spend this time with him in between surgeries, because his body just couldn’t take anymore.

I will never forget the look on the Doctor’s face when he came to give my family the news. One look, and the words “I’m so sorry,” and life would never be the same again for us. It’s just not something that you could ever prepare yourself for.

If I could have just one more talk with him, there are so many things I would say. If I could just see the joy that Eli would bring to him. If he could just call me ‘baby girl’ one more time. He was such a lover, and never let a day go by without pouring it out on his family. I sob uncontrollably as I write this, wanting so badly to wrap my arms around him. I’ve spent a lot of time this week looking through old pictures of my dad. What wonderful memories he has left me with, that I can’t wait to share with Eli. We can’t wait to tell him about his Papa that is up in heaven. It just breaks my heart that Eli will never be able to know him as we did.





It’s easy to say ‘what if,’ but we know that the plan for his life was in much greater hands. There’s not a doubt in my mind that he’s in better hands now. No more aches, or pains, or the stresses of today.

Losing my dad, just 5 short weeks before our wedding day, was an absolute test of faith. You can only ask WHY so many times, before it really hits you. I was able to trust in what God’s word says, even when the circumstances made no sense at all. The sorrow was and is still there, but the trust I have in His future promises is even greater. I never dreamed that I would walk down the aisle with any other than my dad, and I never imagined that he would miss the birth of my first born. But it’s as if he was right there, on both occasions. I’m so thankful for the people that were put into my life, to help guide me through such trying times. I lost a father, and the very next month gained a husband that vowed to love me unconditionally. When Danny asked my dad for my hand in marriage, he said, “Only if you promise to love her as much as I do.” We cling to those words, and always will.

This is the day that Danny asked my dad...



Who knew that this would be our last dance



Here are some lyrics to one of my absolute favorite songs…

“I want to leave a legacy
How will they remember me?
Did I choose to love? Did I point to You enough
To make a mark on things?
I want to leave an offering
A child of mercy and grace who
blessed your name unapologetically
And leave that kind of legacy

Not well traveled, not well read, not well-to-do or well bred
Just want to hear instead, "Well Done" good and faithful one...”

I look at Eli today, tears in my eyes, and a big smile on his face, and know that he was sent to serve a big purpose. This day is a little bit easier this year, now that we have a little piece of heaven to hold onto and love with all of our hearts. Thank you Lord for lending us such a sweet sweet blessing!